A team of reputed genetic scientist have stunned the entire
nation (MOTO: The nation needs an answer) today evening by disclosing its
results the Rahul Gandhi may lack the gene for normal human intelligence.
While on this note, let me finish my last piece of Mexican platano.
This group which has been studying Rahul since the 2014 election
campaign have made this startling discovery when they were studying the
differences in IQ levels between humans and chimps. One of the leading
scientists has quoted “We have found in his blood samples extremely high levels
of Potassium which directly indicates a banana-rich diet which is rarely found
in human inhabiting the Janpath road.”
Prompted by this clue, the group of scientist have probed much
further in the DNA and found “No substantial evidence” of human intelligence.
In fact they only found traces to suggest that the sample’s IQ could at most be
of that of rotten cabbage.
From the congress party office, their spokesperson have no
comments and are currently trying to blame the Rahul’s bananas are coming from
the Gujarat region which may be the cause. However, the BJP have questioned this
claim and have decided to boycott the next parliamentary session all together.
In defence of the findings, the scientist group have claimed
that in their experiments they have taught a female baboon to say things such
as “Women empowerment”, “RTI”, “One Minute Arnab” as their vocabulary. So they
say this should not be confused with actual human speech.
In a related research done in Karnataka, scientist say that they
have found that Dig Vijay Singh has an abnormal double-gene for human speech
and this explains why it is virtually impossible to get him to shut-up. Some of
the research group are also claiming that Arvind Kejriwal may have a curled
gene which makes him autocratic on any matter.
While on this note, let me finish my last piece of Mexican platano.
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