In a shocking press meet
announcement today legendary pathetic cricketer RJ Shastri decided to quit
Commentary and decides to start playing golf. If Navjoth Sidhu had his book of
idioms and phrases, then RJ shastri had his own “Cliches”. In an illustrious
and boring career spanning 20 years, shastri has spoilt a lot of gripping
cricket matches with his monotonous monotone voice and repeated clichés.
The entire cricketing world is
reeling under a state of shock due to this sudden turn of events. The ICC is
currently convening an emergency meeting to address the void created by
Shastri. There are many in the race currently such as Rameez Raja, Murali
Kartik, L.Sivaramakrishnan who are quiet capable and have enough vocabulary to
match Shastri.
Many fans of ESPN and STAR
cricket are currently yet to get over the shocking announcement and they are
quiet bewildered. The fans have always just tuned into the match to mainly MUTE
shastri’s comments and they love his presentation party speech. The city of
Bangalore has decided to host an evening of FREE beer to everyone who comes out
of the house just to show their solidarity and faith in Shastri’s decision.
Shastri whose commentating career
spans over 22 years which is equivalence of 88 years of boredom in the
commentary media has some famous clichés which have been used to the maximum.
Sunil Gavaskar who was the first to react upon hearing the news is now
pondering on when he will decide to bite the bullet.
Shastri’s best friend Sidhu,
Naser Hussia has all expressed grief over this decision and wish him the very
best for his future endeavour. BCCI president N.Srinivasa has quoted “There has
been no greater servant of BCCI…I mean Indian cricket, than Ravi Shastri. His
self-endorsed, honest and unbiased opinions will be missed. To help him, we
have decided to start an academy for commentating”.
As far as the fans are concerned, they shall be
waiting for the next drone in the commentary box and until then they will
always remember his clichés – “Make no mistake about it, this stage of the game
is nicely poised.”
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