Summer vacation season is here and so is April, I do not know if this is purely coincidental but let us give the benefit of the doubt. I know how it is for those parents who have their child given their 12th exams. They are all thinking about which college, what course, how much money, is there drugs in those colleges et cetera, while the child is plainly thinking nothing else than college education. (I know this is a pure lie, all the 12th Standard kids think about is free time, movies and girls, Trust me kids, it is what you get in today’s college.)
Back in my college days, just a decade back, it was not so much fun as today. Now-a-days these colleges have fashion shows, coffee pubs, Mexican snacks, European drinks and probably some subjects pertaining to their course. Sailing through this looks very easy compared to olden times where even attendance was compulsory.
College is basically a set of arranged rooms which have desk and chairs where you sit for 5600 hours which is split across 4 years called as classes. There is always a brooding old man known as a Professor who holds and manages these classes. The classes are used mainly for learning things which would be helpful to you.
The type of learning in a college is divided into 2 main categories:
1. Things which will help you later in life: 8 hours
These include how to save money by using SMS to send answers, places where DVDs are cheap, a complete directory of medical college girl students contact number and things like that.
2.Hours of boring data not needed for real life experience: 5592 hours
This includes all the –ilogy, itcs, ics, -istry ending subjects which the student is required to memorize to an extent that he spits all the data into the answer sheet and immediately forget them. All though the memorizing part is pretty tough the forgetting part is easy except that we may not be able to erase all the data. Even today we remember a few that we have been trying to forget for the past 10 years.
It now boils down to the fact that you have to choose a specialization course and my basic 20 cents of wisdom is to choose subjects that do not have 1) known facts, 2)need to be accurate and 3) lot of Greek sounding names and numbers. Subjects like mathematics, physic and chemistry all require the above 3 points. There is no way a student can pass the exam without giving the accurate answer which the professor has in his mind.
Take for example, at any point of time if you walk into a physics course class room you would be able to hear a question like this: “Can you derive an equation for a particle with a cosine constant over a rhomboid surface on the third axis of the quadratic dimension and extrapolate it into 5 different vertices along the binary axis”. For students who are weak in understanding the question (Which is whole of the student community) it is very difficult to come up with the answer that the professor has in mind. Leave the answer alone, it would take around 45 minutes for you to read and comprehend the question and think of how to answer it.
Back in my college days, just a decade back, it was not so much fun as today. Now-a-days these colleges have fashion shows, coffee pubs, Mexican snacks, European drinks and probably some subjects pertaining to their course. Sailing through this looks very easy compared to olden times where even attendance was compulsory.
College is basically a set of arranged rooms which have desk and chairs where you sit for 5600 hours which is split across 4 years called as classes. There is always a brooding old man known as a Professor who holds and manages these classes. The classes are used mainly for learning things which would be helpful to you.
The type of learning in a college is divided into 2 main categories:
1. Things which will help you later in life: 8 hours
These include how to save money by using SMS to send answers, places where DVDs are cheap, a complete directory of medical college girl students contact number and things like that.
2.Hours of boring data not needed for real life experience: 5592 hours
This includes all the –ilogy, itcs, ics, -istry ending subjects which the student is required to memorize to an extent that he spits all the data into the answer sheet and immediately forget them. All though the memorizing part is pretty tough the forgetting part is easy except that we may not be able to erase all the data. Even today we remember a few that we have been trying to forget for the past 10 years.
It now boils down to the fact that you have to choose a specialization course and my basic 20 cents of wisdom is to choose subjects that do not have 1) known facts, 2)need to be accurate and 3) lot of Greek sounding names and numbers. Subjects like mathematics, physic and chemistry all require the above 3 points. There is no way a student can pass the exam without giving the accurate answer which the professor has in his mind.
Take for example, at any point of time if you walk into a physics course class room you would be able to hear a question like this: “Can you derive an equation for a particle with a cosine constant over a rhomboid surface on the third axis of the quadratic dimension and extrapolate it into 5 different vertices along the binary axis”. For students who are weak in understanding the question (Which is whole of the student community) it is very difficult to come up with the answer that the professor has in mind. Leave the answer alone, it would take around 45 minutes for you to read and comprehend the question and think of how to answer it.
The other problem with these kinds of subjects is that the professors are very particular about the result and also want to exactly know how you arrived at this solution. So even if your friend SMSes the answers to you, you may not be in a position to explain the results if called for.
It is for this problem that I wish to advice students from taking Engineering courses since it requires 1) for you to know facts and figures, 2) furnish correct answers. I know not many are capable of doing this for 4 years in a row. Hence I would like to advice them to take courses which only requires you to manipulate English words and where any answer is a correct answer.
Yes, there are subjects like that which is what I am going to elaborate in the below section.
English: This involves about writing your views on a long and dry essay such as the Moby dick. Everyone who has read Moby Dick will know the story is about a whale but you are not supposed to write what is common sense. I base this rule since the evaluator would be seeing thousands of answer papers with the same whale story, so to catch his attention it would be nice if you could rephrase it so say that Moby dick was a whale who got injured in an oil-slick near the coast of Ireland and was rescued by few Vikings during the 100 year war. The evaluating professor would really be relieved to see someone outside the memorizing unit and will give you an “A” grade. If you can come up with such lunatic ideas 4 times a year around then English is the major suited for you.
Philosophy: This is the best course if you have a brain working capacity of a rotten turnip. All you have to do in this course is to sit inside a dim light class room and go on discussing about what is success or there is no such things as reality, there will be a time when politicians are totally non-corrupt and things which makes no sense to a common man. The weirder you think the better chances for you to graduate with distinction. If you were like drinking and drugs, then it is an added advantage for this course.
Psychology: This course is all about talking of rats and dreams. All psychiatrists are obsessed with dreams and its interpretations. One of the requirements for this course is that you should wear thin rimmed glasses and brow a beard that touches your lower stomach, adds personality to what you blabber.
You may have to spend a whole semester trying to teach a rat to staple booklets and arrange them in chronological order. You may also train your roommate with the same exercise. In the end you will find that the rat does it better than your roommate and your roommate is today a leading heart specialist. If you can live with rats then you have a nice career in psychiatry.
Sociology: This is by far the best course in offer for those who can churn incoherent sentences at will all the time. Sociology classes deals with trying to understand the social behavior of man with constant comparison with an ant or a pig. You may have to read tons of social writing to gain expertise in this area and in not of them would you be able to make any sense of what the author is trying to express.
My guess is that sociologist tries to think themselves as scientists and make up complex sentences while trying to explain basic human emotions. Take for example that you have to explain why a child cries when he is slapped and the sociologist (in minimum) comes up with an observation such as “Methodical and schematic observation of the sociometrical behavior of a pre-adolescent isolate member indicates the cross functional matrix relationship between the moving trajectory of the harder object and the cheeks leads to lacrimatory, or crying in common term.
If you can come up with such rotten sentences then you are the right choice for this course,. If you can continuously come up with such sentences for more than 5 years, you will be inducted into the governments planning commission where you will end up writing committee reports while earning in crores.
My advice to all is, do not attempt to take a course such as medicine or engineering which requires us to reproduce known facts and requires exact answers and end up as a failure while you have other easy and fast earning courses such as the above listed ones.
Why do you think you have to believe me, well I am an engineer and know the exact speed of light in total vacuum. Wait is it in vacuum or in ether … no, it is the speed of light or electron. Well, whatever it is – I am in Software management – period.
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