FM Radio's Junk Shows

If there is a radio nearby kindly turn it on. The reason why I am requesting is that it gives you far greater assurance that there are great many stupider morons than you existing in this world. For some reason I always believed that the radio jockey’s are directly download from a far away planet like craziod or flobber who have a working brain functionality of a turnip.

Just for argument sake, let me demonstrate how a normal radio show works.

Note: The names are changed to protect their identity.

Host: “Hi, This is “Pesallam Vanga” show and this is your favourite host Sirchi Muchi. Today’s topic is “Is the Union budget necessary?” So before the show starts let us listen to a lousy new Tamil song without any Tamil words in it.

[Song plays for quiet a long time]

Host: “Hello caller”
[Static Noise]
Host: “Hello caller – I can’t hear you, reduce your radio volume and continue”

[Static Noise increases]
[Bang – Hammer hitting the head, then Static noise decreases]

Caller: “Hi Muchi, I am James”
Host: “Yes James, go ahead”
Caller: “Oooooowwwwooowwww, am I really on air?”
Host: “Yes, go ahead”
Caller: “I can’t believe that I am talking with Sirchi Muchi”
Host: “Yes, it is true sir, come on talk”
Caller: “Ok, I am a bit nervous but let me tell you what happened to my neighbour’s house. Last night while they were busy watching the mega-serial on TV a gang of 3 robbers came and wiped out their house. In fact one of the gang members is supposedly to my neighbour’s nephew. It is also rumoured that …”

[Host interrupting]

Host: “Ok, but can you tell me your opinion about the budget”
Caller: “What budget, I am not a city brought up and hence my wife only takes care of the budgets.”
Host: “Not your budget, I am talking about the Union budget”
Caller: What Union?”
Host: “Well thanks for your views on the budget. While I wait for the next caller, you can continue listening to the next song which is also a crap.”
[Song looks like it goes on for ever]

Caller: “Denise… is that you?”
Host: “Welcome sir, you are right now talking on the show “Pesallam Vanga” with me the host Sirchi Muchi. So what is your view on the union budget?”
Caller: “Well I have no views of any sort, I just am trying to get holds of Denise ‘coz he stole my girlfriend and I am fully armed. In case he calls up, just warn him about this.”
[C-L-I-C-K]

Host: “Well, guess today is a bit busy day for all, while we wait for someone to talk about the budget you can hear the same song which we play on a daily basis since the production manager bought the rights for this song very cheap”
[Song which no one has heard till now]

Caller: “Hello Muchi, is this “Pesallam Vanga” show?”
Host: “Yes and who are you?”
Caller: “This is Ramu and I calling to correct the data about what Mr. James said. I am in no way related to the robbery which took place yesterday night. I was in fact just smoking marijuana next to the college playground and hence want you to correct the information for me”
Host: “OK fine but before you leave, do you have any views on this union budget this year?”
Caller: “I just like to tell the finance minister to lower the prices of tobacco since it is very difficult for me to smoke pot with this kind of prices.”
Host: “Well I am longing for someone to talk about this union budget until that occurs kindly hear the song or better still switch channels”
[Song which no one has heard till now]

Caller: “Hello Muchi, I would like to express my opinion on the union budget and my name is Shyam”
Host: “Well Shyam nice to know at least one caller wants to talk about the topic but unfortunately time is out for this show so you can try tomorrow when we shall discuss about the Presidential Elections in the US. Until then enjoy the day and this is Sirchi Muchi signing off – BYE”
[CLICK - Radio Switched OFF]