This is the time of year when my company makes a sincere effort to care about their employees company performance award, which determines which project team will be the champion of the entire organisation, except for the part of the world located outside the United States and southeastern Canada.
This is precisely the time when we (9 people) decided to make a tour to Miami and have an enjoyable weekend at the place where everyone wants to keep their footprints imprinted in time immemorial. This decision was taken well before I was even considered as an invitee. Nevertheless to make the names as anonymous as possible I have found a very effective way of appending “zh” before every name. Hence we can retain the anonymity in them. (Remember that I flunked in my Coding Theory class)
The itinerary was framed by zhsenthil, which had in the available time of 48 hrs for us, a way where we could cover more then 70% of the North American Continent and weather providing a short stay of 70 seconds in the North Pole. The places and attractions were marked in such a way that the MAP for us now represented only as a tool to get lost easily. Zhanbu and zhsuren the two most oldest team members in the crowd (a combined age of these two though less than zhnacha who alone tallies more then 4560 Gregorian calendar yrs) decided that in order to maintain the schedule that had been planned, we had to prepare food for the complete duration of the trip and then start the journey.
Hence, on the D-Day half the population of mainland China was involved in preparing chapattis for our trip. We had estimated to make 4 million of them though we ended up making enough to feed the African continent for the next 45 years even after our consumption. Though the idea was good, but the estimation lacked a bit of practicality like any other software development project. The idea was to make chappathis that were soft so that we can consume it even while coming back to Tampa Bay. The implementation with the help of the experienced “chapatti maker” zhrams, we created soft chappathis, which unfortunately was soft only for 7 nanoseconds from the time we took it from the stove. Then it was transformed into the third hardest known materials in the world and second in the Andromeda Galaxy. (Source NASA Mars Path Finder)
So when this dinner preparation chaos was underway, I entered and add a pinch of salt to the bruises by making curd rice with what ever was remaining in the kitchen. Though many don’t know what went into the making of it, but it turned out to be palatable. Here is a sample of the ingredients … a few ounces of TNT, methanol and some ginger oil to provide the taste. This may also be used as rocket fuel after 3 days of fermentation. Now with all the food ready we packed our bags and got us all loaded into the car carefully folded and placed between the food packets which occupied more than 80% of the car space, 10% was occupied with CD that contained songs which were possibly recorded during the signing of the American Independence.
There are a few people for whom FORD made cars as a sleep inducing medicine, one such person is zhnacha. All she needed was the sound of the gear shifting to go into a sleep mode. Like Newton’s First law, she will continue to be in the same state unless acted upon by an external force … Smell of food. Like zhnacha, there was another guy named zhsathish who also had the same syndrome. So we placed both of them in separate cars hence both the cars could have the Dolby Surround Sound of …. Yes … Snoring.
Snoring is a series problem for all car travelers in the US, one that affects more than shark attacks and Vadivellu jokes combined. Yet many people - here I am in now way referring to zhancha - refuse to admit that they snore a lot. Coming back to our drive … there was nothing much happening expect that we kept calling from our cell phones to the other car asking the precise location where we will have our Dinner … the prima motive for zhmuthu and zhkanagu. (I had to somehow introduce them into the story too.)
After roughly 3 hours of travel, we decided to take a break and wake up zhnacha. So I got out of the car and opened the boot to let zhmuthu and zhkanagu some air and also take out the dinner. We had chappathis, chappathis and more chappathis until 2% of the total chappathis were consumed by the 9 of us. After that the car that I was traveling felt that zhnacha was a danger to our lives since she started to induce sleep into the driver and thereby to all the others in the car. It went so bad that even the truck driver following us was in a state of drowsiness due to Zhnacha. Hence, a unanimous decision (I was not included in this for some reason … I am not making this up) was taken and I was pushed into the front seat to help the driver from not getting distracted – distraction such as zhnacha sleeping in the back seat.
Zhanbu requested me to remind him about filling up gas at some point before we hit Miami Beaches… hence I was on guard looking out for the possible GAS station in the middle of a Marshy forest. I failed to look at a rather insignificant board which said “Last Gas station on Plant Earth here … No Gas station for the next 32 billion Light years” or something equivalent like that. Since there were no figurative signs such as a Gas Station and a RED cross across it, I felt I better ignore it. All this while, zhanbu the driver felt that cars are better flying rather than rolling on the roads. So we were (I am not making this up also) not going too fast but literally flying too low. We got several air control messages to fly a little high since many clock towers were on our direct path.
Zhanbu, on my small piece of advice, disregarded all the warnings coming from the back seat and was pressing high on the GAS until Newton’s third law came into effect … the car started to land and we hit the road and the engines looked like stopping … reason … NO G-A-S … the indicator lights started flashing and it looked like there was no sign of a station anywhere nearby. By this time, zhanbu became tensed and so was I… but I was for a different reason. The AC blower was so fine tuned to hit the navigators abdominal region that his bladder was becoming FULL at an alarming rate … the irony was seen, his bladder is FULL while the petrol tank was hitting rock bottom. The situation went on for about 35 min and 30 miles went by still NO sign of the station nor did Zhanbu have any intentions of letting me (the navigator) answer to Nature’s call.
This is precisely the time when we (9 people) decided to make a tour to Miami and have an enjoyable weekend at the place where everyone wants to keep their footprints imprinted in time immemorial. This decision was taken well before I was even considered as an invitee. Nevertheless to make the names as anonymous as possible I have found a very effective way of appending “zh” before every name. Hence we can retain the anonymity in them. (Remember that I flunked in my Coding Theory class)
The itinerary was framed by zhsenthil, which had in the available time of 48 hrs for us, a way where we could cover more then 70% of the North American Continent and weather providing a short stay of 70 seconds in the North Pole. The places and attractions were marked in such a way that the MAP for us now represented only as a tool to get lost easily. Zhanbu and zhsuren the two most oldest team members in the crowd (a combined age of these two though less than zhnacha who alone tallies more then 4560 Gregorian calendar yrs) decided that in order to maintain the schedule that had been planned, we had to prepare food for the complete duration of the trip and then start the journey.
Hence, on the D-Day half the population of mainland China was involved in preparing chapattis for our trip. We had estimated to make 4 million of them though we ended up making enough to feed the African continent for the next 45 years even after our consumption. Though the idea was good, but the estimation lacked a bit of practicality like any other software development project. The idea was to make chappathis that were soft so that we can consume it even while coming back to Tampa Bay. The implementation with the help of the experienced “chapatti maker” zhrams, we created soft chappathis, which unfortunately was soft only for 7 nanoseconds from the time we took it from the stove. Then it was transformed into the third hardest known materials in the world and second in the Andromeda Galaxy. (Source NASA Mars Path Finder)
So when this dinner preparation chaos was underway, I entered and add a pinch of salt to the bruises by making curd rice with what ever was remaining in the kitchen. Though many don’t know what went into the making of it, but it turned out to be palatable. Here is a sample of the ingredients … a few ounces of TNT, methanol and some ginger oil to provide the taste. This may also be used as rocket fuel after 3 days of fermentation. Now with all the food ready we packed our bags and got us all loaded into the car carefully folded and placed between the food packets which occupied more than 80% of the car space, 10% was occupied with CD that contained songs which were possibly recorded during the signing of the American Independence.
There are a few people for whom FORD made cars as a sleep inducing medicine, one such person is zhnacha. All she needed was the sound of the gear shifting to go into a sleep mode. Like Newton’s First law, she will continue to be in the same state unless acted upon by an external force … Smell of food. Like zhnacha, there was another guy named zhsathish who also had the same syndrome. So we placed both of them in separate cars hence both the cars could have the Dolby Surround Sound of …. Yes … Snoring.
Snoring is a series problem for all car travelers in the US, one that affects more than shark attacks and Vadivellu jokes combined. Yet many people - here I am in now way referring to zhancha - refuse to admit that they snore a lot. Coming back to our drive … there was nothing much happening expect that we kept calling from our cell phones to the other car asking the precise location where we will have our Dinner … the prima motive for zhmuthu and zhkanagu. (I had to somehow introduce them into the story too.)
After roughly 3 hours of travel, we decided to take a break and wake up zhnacha. So I got out of the car and opened the boot to let zhmuthu and zhkanagu some air and also take out the dinner. We had chappathis, chappathis and more chappathis until 2% of the total chappathis were consumed by the 9 of us. After that the car that I was traveling felt that zhnacha was a danger to our lives since she started to induce sleep into the driver and thereby to all the others in the car. It went so bad that even the truck driver following us was in a state of drowsiness due to Zhnacha. Hence, a unanimous decision (I was not included in this for some reason … I am not making this up) was taken and I was pushed into the front seat to help the driver from not getting distracted – distraction such as zhnacha sleeping in the back seat.
Zhanbu requested me to remind him about filling up gas at some point before we hit Miami Beaches… hence I was on guard looking out for the possible GAS station in the middle of a Marshy forest. I failed to look at a rather insignificant board which said “Last Gas station on Plant Earth here … No Gas station for the next 32 billion Light years” or something equivalent like that. Since there were no figurative signs such as a Gas Station and a RED cross across it, I felt I better ignore it. All this while, zhanbu the driver felt that cars are better flying rather than rolling on the roads. So we were (I am not making this up also) not going too fast but literally flying too low. We got several air control messages to fly a little high since many clock towers were on our direct path.
Zhanbu, on my small piece of advice, disregarded all the warnings coming from the back seat and was pressing high on the GAS until Newton’s third law came into effect … the car started to land and we hit the road and the engines looked like stopping … reason … NO G-A-S … the indicator lights started flashing and it looked like there was no sign of a station anywhere nearby. By this time, zhanbu became tensed and so was I… but I was for a different reason. The AC blower was so fine tuned to hit the navigators abdominal region that his bladder was becoming FULL at an alarming rate … the irony was seen, his bladder is FULL while the petrol tank was hitting rock bottom. The situation went on for about 35 min and 30 miles went by still NO sign of the station nor did Zhanbu have any intentions of letting me (the navigator) answer to Nature’s call.
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