Sales Down For Vijay Sethupathy's New Movie Due to SMS Reviews

Vijay Sethupathy’s latest film idharkuthane aasaipattai balakumara (Hereafter known as IAB) has recorded a steep fall in tickets sales at counters and booking websites as soon as rumors of it being an intelligent film started doing rounds on internet. The booking window of the film opened with huge response and was going at full swing until the tragedy struck.

It all began with an SMS that started doing rounds saying that IAB is Vijay Sethupathy’s first attempt at thought provoking cinema with a powerful script that touches your soul. The SMS spread like a wildfire and contents of it also got circulated on social media, resulting in reversal of fortunes for the movie.

The producers of IAB have termed it a conspiracy and a cheap attempt by some jealous people to damage Vijay Sethupathy’s growing image thereby affecting the outcome of the film.

“How can people even believe that this movie would make sense? Haven’t they seen the trailers of IAB and haven’t they heard how many lives the trailer alone has claimed so far? Or do they watch trailers also leaving their brains behind?” asked an angry distributor.

Apart from producers and distributors, Vijay Sethupathy fans are also unhappy.

“After NKPK, Pizza, and Soodhukuavum, I had got my brains surgically removed so that I can enjoy IAB like a normal cine viewer. Now I just don’t recall where I have kept it. How irresponsible and heartless of Vijay to disappoint his fans and come out with a smart film like this. Now how on earth am I supposed to enjoy it without brains,” said a fan who has switched over his allegiance to Siva Karthikeyan with the hope that he won’t disappoint.

Meanwhile Vijay Sethupathy is trying to pacify his fans and asking them to not believe in rumors of IAB being a wonderfully scripted film and assured them of it being even shittier than all his previous films clubbed together.

“Moolai ellam vendaam, summa enjoy pannu idharkuthane aasaipattai balakumara,” the actor reassured his fans.

To make sure the damage is minimum, Vijay Sethupathy has requested SUN TV’s Top Ten Movies to watch IAB and review it and give it as poor rating as they can. As per sources, the producers have promised to take care of all medical expenses that would be required for the reviewer’s treatment thereafter.

He has further requested another critic magazine Anadha Vikatan to strictly stay away from reviewing this film lest they do some more damage by giving it a 4 stars rating.

A Rare Video Footage Revealed, Means Vijaykanth is Alive

In a rare video footage which has currently, become viral on the internet of actor Vijaykanth has suddenly thrown the Tamil cinema fanatics into a horror spin, since it makes us believe that Vijaykanth is active and wanting to do more movies.

The rare video footage is a self-shot interview in which he is seeing trying to promote his film with daring one-liners about the Tamil Nadu government. With the actor virtually disappeared from the film scene since 2002 after his mega-hit movie “Ramana”, this video leads many to believe that he is alive and contemplating on a comeback movie.

The intelligence agencies are currently working overtime to verify the authenticity of the video footage. They are closely monitoring every frame of the video to ascertain if the person who is answering the interview is actually Mr.Vijaykanth. The agencies are withholding the final verdict until further conclusive evidence is reached.

Sources close to the agencies have quoted that it is very difficult to analyse if the person is Vijaykanth or a wooden puppet placed there. One of the agencies spokesperson replied “We think it is Mr. Vijaykanth when looking at the features of the person but we also think that it may be a wooden puppet.” The main problem is that the wooden puppet is actually more animated than the person.

The film society fraternity is also comparing the video footage of “Ramana” and the interview footage and they fear the worst. One of the investigators told newspersons “In fact, we have looked into the tape and the movie and now are contemplating whether the wooden puppet was actually one of the cast in the movie Ramana.”

So as a responsible citizen, I am warning you that Vijaykanth may be active and thinking about another venture in 2019. Beware folks; we already had “Thalaiva” maybe “Puratchi Thalaiva” is around the corner.